In re Underby's Case

The dawn light seeped through the hazy Babbage air as Grace read over her final draft. She leaned back in her chair, joints in her hands aching and eyes bleary.

To The Clockwinder, Mosseveno Tenk, Mayor of New Babbage
and The Babbage Militia

In re: Underby's Case

Esteemed Mayor and members of the New Babbage Militia, chief among those being Jedburgh Dagger and Sky Netizen:

The continued jailing of Mr. Yoyo Underby, accused murderer of the being called Pip Steamer, must cease immediately.

The following facts cannot be disputed:

1. Mr. Underby, a citizen of New Babbage, has already been held on the basis of hearsay evidence longer than the law allows.

2. The autopsy of Pip Steamer, performed by the esteemed Dr. Miggins, has demonstrated conclusively that Pip Steamer was not, by definition, a human being.

3. The law, as written, states that murder is the act of one human being causing the death of another human being.

Regardless of public opinion concerning the nature of Pip Steamer, the law as written does not provide for the punishment of a human being who has allegedly murdered a non-human. Thus, logically, it follows that the "murder" of Pip Steamer is not an actionable crime, and all charges against Mr. Underby must be dropped.

I await your confirmation that Mr. Underby will be set at liberty post haste.

Sincerely,
Grace Toussaint, Esq.

***

Grace slowly copied out her letter three times, and then headed to City Hall, hoping to put one in the hands of Mr. Tenk before heading to the Militia headquarters to post the letter on its doors.

((It is now up to the citizens of Babbage to work together to either change the law ... or I suppose attempt vigilante justice. *smirks* Either way, I look forward to more healthy debate on just what constitutes life and how best to protect it!))